Dec 9, 2008

Two Peas Plus One Pod

One question we get asked often and something I think about too . . . do we detect differences, in what ever way differences manifest, between identical Bereket and Sira versus each of them with fraternal brother Tsega? Answer: yes.

I say there are clear and remarkable differences between Bereket and Sira. I feel differences between their overall auras and the way they move about, behave, sound, and express themselves. Yet at the same time, I can't seem to communicate very large differences to outsiders effectively. And hardly anybody has become very good at telling them apart with confident gusto. I fear they will always be greeted with a shaky "Hi there." and never like what Tsega gets: "Hi Tsega!!!". Show me a picture and I can tell you in an instant who is who. I think pictures capture their individualities better than the roving eye and I know you, readers, are pretty good at it. Get them running around the house naked, however, and I need more clues.

So yes, Bereket and Sira are different, but so much alike in so many ways it's spooky. It's genetic power. They tend to mill around together, wander off in the same direction (see photos captured above), observe the same things, stop and play the same toy together, mimic one another, turn their heads in the same direction at the same time, want the same thing at the same time, wake at the same time . . . it goes on and on like this. If I poke a finger in Bereket's food, I must touch Sira's (oh wait, never-ever touch Bereket's food lest you want him to meltdown); if I put shoes on Sira, I must put shoes on Bereket. If Bereket takes off his jacket, Sira follows; if Sira flops his butt down in the bath tub, Bereket follows. Ever read Gossie and Gertie? They are like that only it's more like Gertie and Gertie. Funny though and maybe luckily, they often don't share a bad mood. They tend to switch off sad hats, so to speak. Why is Sira so cranky right now? Because it's Bereket's turn to be really happy. (Or vice versa.)

Then there is Tsega. Tsega is like nobody. He is as different from his brothers like the sun is from the moon. He follows no lead. Even positionally, he is often wandering by himself outside the Bereket and Sira circle. In appearances and personality there could not be wider differences. He is so different it's also spooky. Again, the power of DNA. But please don't go the dark route as other have gone and start guessing that he is not genetically related . . . all that I know and have verified leaves me doubtless . . . just to calm any suspicious out there . . . shhh.

But now to the meat. Despite differences, similarities, nucleic acid duplications, embryonic splittings, in utero sac sharing, and identical twin telepathy, Sira and Bereket are no tighter than each one is with Tsega. They all get along about the same. They have all hated, fought, bonded to, and loved one another equally. We are a team.

Although I must admit the identical twin thing is really cool to witness; there is indeed something quite special about it. Like I've said before, we do not have medical or scientific proof Sira and Bereket are identical. But all the anecdotal proof is outstanding. And how lucky am I that I get best of both: fraternal and identical multiples all in one set.

By the way, guess what I found out? The ear piercing on Sira's upper right ear; the little hole that is a sure thing and only belongs to Sira . . . All this time I assumed somebody pierced it for identifying purposes. Nope, he was born with it.


Meg said...

I love your descriptions of your children's personalities. So passionate, elegant, sweet, and emotional.
You are so lucky!

Meg DeZutti said...

Okay -- let me try my hand at this. Sira is on the right in the top right photo, and in the middle, on the blanket photo, right? Sira raises his eyebrows more than Bereket when he smiles, giving him more of a "surprised to see you" look. How did I do?
Your boys are glorious and perfect and you and Jerry are obviously giving them all the love in the world because they just seem to flourish in your photos. You are so blessed to be their parents!

Anonymous said...

It is interesting how alike two of them are and yet as a group, they seem to be such a great unit. I love reading about them.

Lyn-Dee said...

This was a fantastic blog. THANKS for sharing

Cindy said...

Meg--you got it! Yes, Sira uses all of his face when he smiles and does express through his eyebrows more. Good job. :)

ethiograndma said...

What I really like is (so far anyway!) nobody is "the boss"...I think its remarkable that they share leadership, sometimes following, sometimes leading! I'm Cindy's mom BTW.

kristine said...

I drop by occasionally to see your beautiful photos. I too love your descriptions. My cousin has triplets who are now in their teens. Identical girls and a boy. They are all pretty much as you describe; incredibly close but then with the twin thing too. It's lovely too see and I'm sad we live far away from them.

What beauty to be a witness to! Thanks for sharing.

Kari:) said...

oh what a small world. I can't believe I saw your tiny triplets on the bulletin board in her office:))) We were actually in the China program & I never dreamed we would someday have our Ethiopian princess:))
We live in Branson, MO.
I adore your blog & will visit often. Thanks for saying hi. Feel free to add us on your it OK if I add you to ours?
You look like an amazing mom & you're an incredible writer!!!

Heather said...

I can't believe it's been two years already! I was holding Jacob Mitiku earlier today and thinking about how time has flied but it also seems like he has always been here.

Easties and Co. said...

That might be my favorite post ever from any blog. SO fascinating!

Sean and Rachel Kerrigan said...

I just read this post (after rediscovering you) and identify so much with your description of the identical set. You have the words down better than I can describe (you have two years on me) but everything you say is true of my boys. It can be so frustrating when no one can tell them apart-and like you say when they are running around necked it can be hard for me to tell unless I get a good look at their faces and expressions! We also don't have biological evidence (didn't want to pay for the DNA test) but all evidence points to them being identical (they even got their first tooth on the same day...) Thanks for the post!